12 – Unwanted and rejected
After some time I found a new place to meet with fellow Christians.
When the first pastor of the Full Gospel Assembly heard I went to this particular church he warned me that I may spiritually die there.
In fact all my activities came to a halt in those years.
Only the Bible groups I had at home were growing but when I needed to go from our home, because we could not accommodate them anymore there was no room to be found for us anywhere.
When also social welfare threatened to stop their support (I was jobless in those days) people started to leave, and in the end I stopped that as well.
In the background I helped the pastor to write a Bible study book, to be used on the Bible school. But when the book was ready, I was no more than a church visitor who now and then gave feedback to the pastor.
Then the pastor got plans to buy a bigger building. I did not really see the need for it, but he pushed through.
In mean time the pastor introduced someone to the church who had been a student of him in the Bible school.
And he gave him an ever increasing number of chances to preach. And he became a member of the church board.
When the church was bought, it was published in a local newspaper. It seemed that all went smooth and well, but…
But there was a women who knew something…
• Something the pastor had done wrong.
• Something that happened 10 years before.
• Something the pastor had not asked forgiveness for from the church board.
This woman contacted the church board about it, and they, now under leadership of the newly introduced brother, wanted to know exactly what happened, and they took it very high that the pastor didn’t ask them for forgiveness. He should have done that 10 years ago.
I asked for permission to speak to the assembly about this matter, because I had a different meaning than they had. But it was not granted.
They were already planning to remove the pastor from the church, so the newly introduced man could take over.
I however believed that if God had forgiven him 10 years ago, for would God continue to bless him otherwise?
▪︎ I told them, that whatever he may have done wrong doesn’t exist anymore for God, and neither should it exist for us.
▪︎ I told them that it was not up to them, to dig up old sin that was dead and buried 10 years ago.
▪︎ And told them that the problem was not that the pastor did something wrong 10 years ago, but that the problem was their unbelieve.
They did not believe that the sacrifice of Jesus at Calvary’s cross, was enough to set him free from whatever he did, but that he even after such long time still needed to ask for their forgiveness (which they were not going to give).
▪︎ They frequently sang “By our love the world will see we are Christians”. But were they showing love now?
▪︎ Jesus said to forgive 70 times 7 times. But what was their testimony if they couldn’t even forgive once?
The assembly needed to know what was going on, and as I was not allowed to speak to them, I decided to write them a letter.
Anyway the pastor, eventhough he still confessed to them, which he in my opinion did not have to do anymore, as it was already forgiven, did not receive forgiveness and was cast out of the church.
So I wrote the letter and this made the newly introduced man, who was by now the pastor, very angry, and he decided it would be best if I would not be allowed to ever again enter any church in the region. And so he did. I became black listed, and unwelcome in all churches.
This church now had a big building, but the number of church members decimated. Someone told me once that there were hardly 20 members left.